The other day I was reading my good friend Kenzee Anderson's blog and I came across this:
I really got to thinking about this and I wondered, am I laughing my way through life? Until about 3 years ago, laughing at my life's problems had not been a problem--not until we had a hard time getting pregnant. Admittedly, though I've had a lot of good laughs, I haven't had as many good laughs about this struggle as I should have...So I started looking for the humor...
I started to realize that one of the reasons I've had such a hard time with it is that I grew up with a lot of negative associations with infertile women. First impression--Sarai--she had to wait to conceive until she was 90 and had to watch Hagar have Ishmael in the meantime for her husband because she could not conceive. Not fun.
Then I thought of the movie Raising Arizona that I saw as a kid. In this movie, the woman finds out that she's infertile and then gets her husband to steal a baby for her so she can be happy again. Not exactly a stable image... (P.S. I'm making this movie sound like a horror flick, but it's actually a comedy.)
Even so, all joking aside, I've been blessed with Shaye, who is so good at making me laugh. I know that he cares about having a family just as much as I do, but he is always good at balancing me and helping me keep things into perspective. Just the other day I was feeling really weird because of a medication I'm on. I kept saying I felt weird and I was kind of moody and weepy. We were watching TV and Shaye was skipping through some commercials and all of the sudden this hospital commercial came on with a mom holding an infant and talking about the joys of motherhood and how you need a good hospital when you deliver. Shaye looked over at me hoping I hadn't seen it and then we both busted out laughing. I'm so lucky to have him.
Another example was the other night when we were at the table praying over our dinner. He said "please help us get pregnant with one baby when it is thy will." I had to laugh. Shaye knows that as we proceed further with treatments, our chances of multiples rises, (mostly the chance of twins...not sextuplets or Octomom style pregnancies)--which makes him a bit nervous, understandably. But I'm like--bring it on!
So until things work out, I'll continue to learn to laugh. We have so many things to be grateful for. If this is our trial for the moment, we're in pretty good shape. But I want to thank you, our friends and family, who've given us so much support. It's helped so much!
4 weeks ago
9 comments:
Amanda you have such a good attitude! Speaking of Sarai, have you read Women of Genesis: Sarah, by Orson Scott Card? It's a cute book!
I know we aren't close, but I want you to know that I've been thinking about you a lot lately, and praying about your situation. I'm rooting for you guys!! :)
That was a great post. Although I'm not dealing with the same stuff right now (I want to have kids, but finishing school first), it made me think about how important it is to laugh! Your post just made me feel better about life in general!
I think about you often and hope for the best for you guys!
Love you Amanda! You are such a positive person. I'm glad we're friends :)
You are so awesome Amanda, I just love you! I love the cute little stories :)
That's something I struggle with too. I was just thinking along these same lines today and thinking, does anybody else think or feel like this? Thanks for making me feel normal!
You are so awesome amanda.. My sister is going throught the same struggle that you are. I don't know how you do it. I know that God knows that you have the strength to pull through and you just showed it right there.
So this sounds super creepy but have you heard of the healer guy in st.g? He works out of green valley spa. I'm not 100% sure it works. But you know melissa judd was having the same problem and she went to him and BAM she was prego. Maybe you could try it. I know it sounds way weird, but my sister went to him a couple of weeks ago and now we're waiting to see
Amanda,
What a great post!! You are such a beautiful and amazing person inside and out. I still have the note you wrote to me when you were little taped in my journal. hahaha You keep smiling and life will work out the way the Lord intended for you. You have such a great spirit about you.
Amanda you are darling...and I love that you share your feelings. Just remember "if the Lord brings you to it he will bring you through it"!
From one who speaks from experience!
You are amazing. I continue to be incredibly impressed by all you have accomplished and also how sweet you are in the face of this trial. You were such a good, positive friend to me for the 9 months that I stomped around being pregnant, convinced that it wasn't what I wanted for my family right now - and meanwhile I had no idea you were going through this. If I were you I might have smacked me, but you just listened. Thank you for that...and for not judging my hesitation at motherhood, especially when I didn't realize how lucky I am. I know life ill work for you.
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